Archive for the Rants Category

day 4: my dream job…

Posted in 30 Day Challenge, Rants, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , on May 4, 2016 by fromthenuthousewithlove

I’ve thought a lot about this, and not just for the purpose of this blog either. This is a topic I have spent literally years thinking about. I have constantly been thinking about what I want to do with my life career wise, and there are so many things I would instantly trade my current job in for. When I say many, I mean that there are so many things that sound better then what I currently do for a living. Realistically speaking, my job now isn’t horrible. It’s a respectable job and it pays my rent and bills. If I’m particularly lucky I may even have a dollar or two left over to buy myself a coffee or an iced cap. However, to me, it feels horrible because it’s just not what I want to be doing for the rest of my life. So if I meet someone that tells me they shovel elephant shit for a living, that is something I will actually consider for a possible career change. Shoving big heaping piles of elephant shit for some reason sounds better to me then answering phones and transferring calls.
One might ask why, which is a completely valid question. The simple answer is, that working in an office just isn’t my style. I hate the dress code that comes with working in an office, I feel ridiculous in “proper office attire”. I also feel that this dress code is completely pointless, as long as I’m getting my work done, what does it matter what I’m wearing. It does though, because in the office world, image is everything. Which brings me to my next point. I’m not one who cares about image or what people think, therefore if something I am wearing causes you to think I am a particular type of person, good for you. It really makes no difference to me what people say, because I know who I am. In the office world though, people judge you based on your appearance, which I feel is truly sad. Also, I have come to notice that in the office world being fake is the new real. You can’t speak your mind, to your co-workers or to clients. If someone pisses you off, you can’t say “Hey quit dicking around and give me that report that I’ve been asking for since last week”. No, you have to say “I know you’re busy but when you get a chance could I please have that report”. It’s bullshit. I hate bullshit, so me and the office world truly don’t mix. Which should explain to you why I’d rather shovel elephant crap for a living. Plus I think the pay is way better than what I make, so there’s another plus.
Seeing as there are no elephants in Canada anymore I am forced to cross that off my list of dream jobs, because I refuse to commute that far, and also moving to a different country is far too complicated, and I’m fairly lazy. So I suppose a job where I can sit at home in my underwear, writing nonsense such as this, would be more ideal and more fitted to the lifestyle I want to live.


job search ventalation…

Posted in Rants on April 21, 2016 by fromthenuthousewithlove

Recently I have begun a job search. I say recently because if I say how long it has actually been people might start to wonder what it is about me that is so painfully unemployable. I think my major problem is there’s bullshit everywhere, and I hate bullshit, so when I see an ad that looks like bullshit, I’ll still apply, but I’m not as enthusiastic as the ad wants me to be. That being said, I’m sure the receivers of my resume can also tell how unenthusiastic I am about applying for these positions, especially when the ads state they’re looking for an “enthusiastic individual”, and my resume screams how uninterested I am in these positions I am applying for.
Realistically though, how passionate about this job does one have to be? I can understand, if someone went to school, and studied for years to become something. That’s passion, that’s devotion; they have a goal in mind and that’s what drives them. I get it. Someone like myself though, who’s just looking for an entry-level position that’s closer to home, just wants a job to pay the bills. Transferring calls to their correct extensions doesn’t give me a warm fuzzy feeling inside. Helping someone figure out what department they need to speak to doesn’t give me a sense of glorification, and signing for a package doesn’t get my panties in a frenzy.
It’s a simple process, companies need people to do the odds n ends jobs that no one else has time for or wants to do, someone like myself needs money, which leads to companies paying folks like myself to work for them.  So what I am really getting at is why can’t we all just call a spade a spade, or however that saying goes. We don’t need to over-glamourize a position that pays you just enough so that you can be broke for 4 days before your next paycheck. Tell me what you’re looking for and what needs to be done, but spare me the bullshit of enthusiasm, I’ve been doing the job for over 10 years, and trust me, it’s not exciting.




surprise!, you have to wait…

Posted in Random Thoughts, Rants, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , on February 25, 2016 by fromthenuthousewithlove

I’d like to start off this post by stating that I absolutely LOVE surprises. I really do, I mean who doesn’t love hearing “I’ve got a surprise for you!”. I love hearing those words, they bring instant sparkle to the instant smile that pops up on my face. You just instantly know it’s going to be something good. It’s such a universal feeling, and what I mean by that, is that no matter who says it to you, you know it’s going to be something in your favour. No one is going to say “I’ve got a surprise for you!…I accidentally got dog poo all over your curtains”.  A surprise is always something that is intended to put a smile on your face. The way I see it, is even if the Grim Reaper himself appeared to you and said “I’ve got a surprise for you!” you know it MUST be followed by something along the lines of you getting to live. Unless of course good ol’ GR has a terrible sense of humour. I can’t say for sure, I don’t actually know him, but you get my point.
That being said, there are two types of surprise-givers. Ones who say “Hey, I got you a surprise!” and then they hand over or show you what the surprise is, all in the same moment. So essentially you’re getting two surprises, the first one being the surprise of first hearing/knowing about the surprise, followed by the actual surprise. Plain. Simple. Effective.
Then you have the other folks, or the “God love’ems” as I like to call them, because in reality they really do mean well. They start out in the same way, by saying “Hey, I got a surprise for you!…”,  sometimes they even do it in a sing songy voice, which is meant to entice you even more, because apparently when things are presented in song our brains are hardwired to become even more excited. I’m not sure if this is a fault or blessing in general, but in this case it’s definitely a fault. I also have come to notice that it usually happens when you’re on the phone with your generous bestower. Almost as if they want to send your brain into a whirling tornado of questions that can’t be answered just yet, because you’ll have to wait and see. You can ask them what it is, but the answer will always be “you’ll have to wait and see” and if you persist…you eventually get, “I can’t tell you, or it will ruin the surprise!”…*facepalm*. News flash to all you God love’ems out there, you’ve already ruined the surprise, because now I am filled with not joy or happiness but a yearning…does anyone know what it’s like to yearn?  You’ve managed to turn an event intended to put a smile on my face into a gut wrenching need, need for what you might ask? I don’t know because according to you I’m gonna have to wait!!!

~end rant~



where taste buds come to die…

Posted in Food, Random Thoughts, Rants with tags , , , , , , , , on June 10, 2013 by fromthenuthousewithlove

I’m not much of a cook. I mean, I can follow a recipe sure, but for some reason that followed recipe never seems to look like the photo, which doesn’t bother me so much because most photo’s of food are edited to look a certain way in order to tantalize our taste buds. It’s the taste that matters, and well, it never has much of that either, in fact it always tastes the exact opposite of what I’d imagine it to taste like.  I can fry up an egg just fine, however even my fried eggs come out a bit too crispy and I’m almost positive eggs aren’t suppose to be crispy or dark around the edges.  You need a knife to get through my eggs…the side of the fork just doesn’t cut it (no pun intended, but in this moment it is much appreciated).
One of my fondest food memories as a child, is my mom’s steak. No one fries up a steak like that chick. I remember sitting at the dinner table with a napkin tied around my neck, and my hands holding a knife and fork with my bare fists, salivating, ready to attack the steak as if I were an animal in the wild ready to hunt down and kill my prey. The moment she would place the plate of steak in front of me, my mouth was preparing itself for the flavour explosion that was about to occur. My irises would transform into little cartoon steaks, tiny steaks with feet would run a circle around my head, and I could feel the buds inside my mouth filling up and bursting with flavourful wonderfulness. This was all before I even took my first bite. The smell of the steak itself had me in its clutches, and when I took a bite, everything lived up to the expectation I had. The world was good.
I don’t eat steak too often these days because I live on my own, and I pay way too much money for rent, steak is not a luxury I can afford at the moment. However, I recently had a craving, and decided to splurge. I called up my mother, asked her exactly how she made it, and everything was working out beautifully, even the aroma was the same. I was so excited, that my mouth began doing the same things it did when I was a child, I couldn’t believe it! I even lit candles for the occasion. I sat down, and cut my first bite. Placed it ever so gently in my mouth, and waiting for the explosion to begin. I kept chewing, anticipating my explosive state. I chewed it 56 times, I counted. Nothing happened. In fact, instead of it tasting awesome and amazing, I got the exact opposite. The reason I chewed that piece of meat 56 times, was because the first portion was denial, and the second portion was my body refusing to let me swallow that atrocity. As much as I tried to, I eventually had to spit it out, or I’d still be chewing it to this very day.
The next day I went out and bought a slow cooker. All I have to say about that, is what a crock of shit (hah another pun not intended, but much appreciated!). Let’s just throw in whatever we can find, let it sit in there for 12 hours, so the shitty taste has time to ferment and you can really let the shittyness soak into everything. I’m convinced that the reason it takes 12 hours (or sometimes more) to cook something, is because they are hoping that you will go on some sort of hunger strike, so that when the food is finally ready for consumption you’ll be so hungry that you might not care that it tastes so shitty because you’ll eat anything at that point. 
I have to go, I’m tired, and starving.

shitty kitchen

The B.S. of C.S…

Posted in Life, Life Tips, Rants, Things that peeve me with tags , , , , , on June 6, 2013 by fromthenuthousewithlove

Wow, second day in a row, of posting. You must all be feeling incredibly fortunate. This post is something I just have to get off my chest because I’ve held it in far too long. One of the worst things in life, and I say one of, because believe me there are so many,  is walking into a store just to have a look around, and then being bombarded by different sales representatives making you feel like a dead carcass being swarmed by vultures. I realize they have jobs to do, and I realize that “customer service” is key to running a business. However I feel that over the years it’s been taken too far. Customer service, to me, means being respectful to patrons, and providing assistance when needed. Far too many stores, are paying far too many people, to now stand at entrances and greet people coming into the store. What is this doing for me? Well it’s not being respectful because it’s providing me annoyance because now I must have what ever thoughts in my head interrupted,  just to respond to someone who isn’t even being sincere with their greeting because let’s face it they don’t want to do it just as much as I don’t want to hear it. So I have to respond with a fake smile and a hello back to these people just so I don’t become the bitch that ruins someones day. Not that I mind being a day ruiner, however if I’m going to go to the extent of taking it to that level I’d like there to be more substance behind my reasoning for doing so. Although that would be pretty funny…It’s also not providing any assistance when needed, because at this point in the retail game, I haven’t even had time to form a question, because I haven’t had time to browse through your merchandise.
What’s even worse than that, is that it doesn’t stop there. You walk into the store, and start browsing because whatever was on your mind that you were looking for has escaped so now you begin the browsing process to sort of get yourself back on track. When another representative of the establishment comes at you just as soon as you pick up the first item and are ready to place it back on the rack because it’s not as interesting as you thought it was, with something along the lines of “Hi there, is there a specific size in that you were looking for?”  I have two problems with this question. One, no I was looking for a general size. Two, just because I pick something up to look at it doesn’t mean I am ready to buy it so get off my tits! Again, not to be rude because I know they are just doing their job I reply with “no thanks, I’m just looking”. No thanks, I’m just looking. That should be enough information for the eager little beaver that approached you, to take a step back and say, “Ok, if you need anything I’ll be right over here” This doesn’t actually happen though, what happens is, they look at that one item you picked up, and all of a sudden they become an expert on your style. “Oh if you like that then you’ll love this”. I don’t actually like that, that’s why I was putting it back, that’s why you shouldn’t just jump on people and let them come to you. At this point I usually put anything I picked up, down and walk out of the store because my patience wears quite thin in those situations, for those that are more patient it continues, and I walk away laughing calling them suckers.
What I’m trying to say, is that the people who are managing these stores, are putting pressure on the employees to provide better customer service, and constantly trying to improve the wrong things in order to make their business stand out to the public eye,  in turn these employees, which are making minimum wage,  have no idea what they can improve on because there is only so much they can do, so they are forced to get creative, which in turn, pisses off people like me that just want to shop, and not be bothered every two seconds.  Instead of improving on something like “better customer service” why don’t they try improving their products, because products that are really good will sell themselves. Also, no one needs store greeters. Thanks! Come again!


traffic light wars…

Posted in Life, Rants, Things that peeve me with tags , , , on February 13, 2013 by fromthenuthousewithlove

I had a situation the other day, where I was walking down the street, with my headphones on listening to some exciting music. I reached a stoplight. It was red, so I ceased walking, like any outstanding citizen would (please, there’s no need for applause of appreciation, I’m just keepin it real). I had the hood of my jacket on due to extreme wind conditions. I have to put my hood on during those conditions because I have bangs, and when you have bangs, you literally CANNOT be friends with wind. It’s esthetically impossible.
For those of you that wear, or have worn hoods, I’m sure you know that turning your head to see what is on either side of you, is not an option. You have to turn your entire torso. So when I’m wearing my hood I try to refrain from having to look around as much as possible because I don’t want to get torsodisplacia.
So I am at a stand still at the stoplight, and the wind is blowing, which is making me curse not only because it’s wind, but because it makes the world a colder place to live. I have a coffee in my left hand so needless to say it’s frozen solid in cup holder’s position, rendering that complete arm useless. I begin doing the side-step dance-a-thon. Stepping from side to side with a little up and down motion, that just so happens to be in tune with the beat of the song I’m listening to (purely coincidental I swear).
In doing this swift motion, my jacket, accidentally rubs the jacket of the woman standing beside me. Which forced me to swivel my torso, so that I may look at her with sincerity and apologize. I’m amazing that way. “I’m sorr…” right in the middle of my attempt she then, in turn shoots me the dirtiest and disgusted look…and I mean downright “I WANT YOU TO DROP DEAD IMMEDIATELY”. Which on a side note, if that actually happened I would totally make sure to drop dead right on top of her, just because I’m one of the nicest people you’ll ever meet doesn’t mean revenge doesn’t make my mouth water. After witnessing the horrible turn of events, I continued with “…y you were in my way”.
Nothing else happened after that, well I mean we both went on our ways, mine was slightly merrier then the Ice Queen’s I’m sure. I just didn’t understand, I didn’t even actually bump into her, our jackets had the hopes of a potential moment. I risked torsodisplacia to apologize to her! I’m not saying she has to worship the ground I walk on, although I wouldn’t refuse (well at first I would but after she insisted I’d eventually give in), but to go as far as dirty looking me?! That my friends, was the day I decided to never again risk my life or health for an apology.

my thought process on grabbing coffee this morning…

Posted in Life, Rants with tags , on January 6, 2013 by fromthenuthousewithlove

I’m sitting at my laptop on a cold January morning. I have no coffee. This is not how things are supposed to work. My coffee machine is broken, and I refuse to feel like my grandfather did in the 1940’s, when he had to walk to school in 50 feet of snow, uphill both ways, just to go get a cup from Timmy’s. It would be so good though, and your leg would finally be able to stop shaking. I don’t want to get dressed though, it seems like an awful lot of work to do. If you do it though you will be able to drink and relax with your smoke, and all will be right in the universe again. It would take me at least 20 minutes. In 20 minutes though at least you know you’d have your coffee. My hair is messy. Who cares! If I go I’m not gonna fix it. That’s FINE! just get the coffee no one will care! What about clothes, do I really need to get dressed? NO! that’s the beauty of it being a Sunday morning, no one cares what you wear, you go grab your coffee and slink back home as if you never left. Let me think about it. Don’t think, just do! You drive a hard bargain. I’m not driving anything, it’s your strong will for coffee that’s taking you there. What if there’s a line up though? You’ll wait. I can’t wear my fuzzy slippers. You’ll wear your winter boots. They aren’t as comfy though, or as cute. It’s a temporary setback, and worth it, for coffee. Coffee. Yes, coffee. Alright, I’m doin it, this better be worth it! Oh, it will be, you won’t regret it. *sigh* I know.